How to Rebuild a Positive Relationship with Food During Weight Loss,

Why Food Relationships Matter More Than You Think

For many people on a weight-loss journey, food becomes something to manage, monitor, or even fear. Calorie counting, restriction, and strict food rules can easily overshadow what eating was meant to be: nourishing, satisfying, and social. Recent research highlights that developing a healthy relationship with food is not just an emotional pursuit but a scientific one. A 2024 review in Nutrients found that the connection between stress, emotional regulation, and eating behaviour is biologically driven, involving hormones like cortisol and ghrelin, neural reward pathways, and our perception of internal hunger cues. This means that when stress or shame governs our eating patterns, the result isn’t just psychological discomfort but physiological imbalance too.

Building a positive relationship with food involves shifting focus away from control and punishment towards awareness, compassion, and nourishment, all principles that support sustainable health outcomes.

Understanding Why Restriction Backfires

For decades, diet culture has equated discipline with success. Yet evidence consistently shows that rigid restriction often leads to rebound behaviours: overeating, loss of self-trust, and a deeper cycle of guilt. Research from Health Expectations (2022) exploring people’s lived experiences of weight management found that overly restrictive approaches often heightened preoccupation with food and feelings of failure.

Biologically, this makes sense. When we restrict food intake, hunger hormones increase, metabolic rate decreases, and our brains heighten the reward response to high-calorie foods. Stress amplifies this effect by releasing cortisol, which in turn increases appetite for energy-dense, highly palatable foods. This mechanism explains why many people crave comfort foods when they are anxious or tired.

Instead of relying on willpower to fight biology, the goal is to create an environment that works with it. That means allowing regular, balanced meals, including foods you genuinely enjoy, and recognising that consistency, not perfection, is what shapes long-term success.

The Power of Mindful Awareness

Mindful eating is more than a wellness buzzword. It’s an evidence-based behavioural strategy that enhances awareness of internal signals such as hunger, fullness, and satisfaction. In multiple clinical studies, mindful eating interventions have been associated with reduced binge-eating frequency, improved diet quality, and greater enjoyment of food.

These strategies underscore that mindful awareness can help decouple stress from eating by retraining the brain’s reward and emotion circuits. This means we begin to respond to hunger rather than habit. Simple practices can help, like eating without screens or distractions, placing utensils down between bites, and taking a few moments to rate hunger and fullness before and after meals. Over time, these strategies rebuild trust in the body’s cues, something many dieters have lost after years of “rules-based” eating.

Language Around Food and Body Image

The way we talk about food profoundly shapes our relationship with it. Phrases like “cheat meals,” “guilt-free snacks,” “bad foods,” or “clean eating” reinforce moral judgements that can fuel shame and disordered eating patterns. Research from Social Science & Medicine (2024) highlights how social narratives around dieting and body ideals contribute to feelings of inadequacy, particularly amongst women, and can perpetuate emotional distress around eating.

A healthier alternative is using neutral, descriptive language, including “nutrient-dense,” “energy-providing,” or “occasional foods.” This framing removes the moral charge and helps individuals make food decisions based on wellbeing rather than guilt.

Body image is part of this equation too. Recognising that health does not always equate to a specific size or weight can free individuals from the constant self-evaluation that drives restrictive behaviour. Success in weight management is more sustainable when it centres on self-efficacy and function, not punishment or aesthetic perfection.

Reconnecting with Enjoyment and Satisfaction

Many people fear that enjoyment and discipline can’t coexist, but the evidence says otherwise. Satisfaction is a critical element of sustainable eating because it prevents the deprivation–binge cycle. Diets rich in variety and flavour support both physiological satiety and emotional satisfaction, reducing the likelihood of rebound eating.

From a nutritional perspective, this can mean incorporating small amounts of your favourite foods within balanced meals. Culturally meaningful or social foods, such as shared dinners, celebratory desserts, family recipes, also play a vital role in wellbeing. When these are enjoyed mindfully and without guilt, they strengthen connection, reduce stress, and promote better adherence to healthy habits overall.

Practical Tools for Building a Healthier Food Relationship

1. Re-establish structure: Eat three balanced meals and 1 snack per day to stabilise blood sugar and prevent reactive hunger. Aim to eat these meals at the same times daily.

2. Balance your plate: Aim for a mix of lean protein, high-fibre carbohydrates, healthy fats, and colourful vegetables. This combination supports fullness and steady energy.

3. Check in, don’t check out: Before eating, rate your hunger on a scale from 1 to 10. Aim to start eating around a 3–4 (gently hungry) and stop at a 7–8 (comfortably satisfied). Try to eat before you become very hungry to avoid seeking energy-dense foods.

4. Journaling prompts: Instead of calorie tracking, reflect on questions like “What am I feeling right now?” or “Did I enjoy that meal?”

5. Mindful exposure: Allow yourself to eat previously “forbidden” foods in a controlled, aware setting. This can dismantle fear and normalise moderation.

6. Professional guidance: For individuals struggling with persistent emotional or disordered eating, evidence supports multidisciplinary care involving dietitians, psychologists, and behavioural specialists.

The Role of Stress and Sleep

Food relationships don’t exist in isolation. Poor sleep and chronic stress reduce self-control, amplify cravings, and impair metabolic health. Individuals under chronic stress are more likely to experience emotional or uncontrolled eating, often as a coping mechanism. Prioritising sleep hygiene, relaxation techniques, and physical activity can indirectly improve eating behaviours by lowering baseline stress hormones.

Final Thoughts: Shifting from Dieting to Nourishment

Rebuilding a positive relationship with food is about much more than changing what’s on your plate; it’s about transforming how you think and feel about eating. Evidence increasingly supports that compassion-based, mindful, and flexible approaches produce better outcomes than strict control.

Whether someone is pursuing weight loss independently or using tools like GLP-1 medication, the principles remain the same: nourish the body, listen to its cues, and remove shame from the process. As healthcare professionals, dietitians have a unique opportunity to lead this shift, blending science and empathy to help people eat in a way that supports both their physical and emotional health.

References:

Eaton, M., Probst, Y., Foster, T., Messore, J. and Robinson, L. (2024). A systematic review of observational studies exploring the relationship between health and non-weight-centric eating behaviours. Appetite, 199, pp.107361–107361. doi:https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2024.107361.

Serrano‐Fuentes, N., Rogers, A. and Portillo, M.C. (2022). The influence of social relationships and activities on the health of adults with obesity: A qualitative study. Health Expectations, 25(4). doi:https://doi.org/10.1111/hex.13540.

Warren, A. and Frame, L.A. (2025). Restoring a Healthy Relationship with Food by Decoupling Stress and Eating: A Translational Review of Nutrition and Mental Health. Nutrients, [online] 17(15), p.2466. doi:https://doi.org/10.3390/nu17152466.

Written by:

Hanna Baldursdottir, Registered Dietitian (RD) with CutKilo

A registered dietitian with an MSc in Dietetics from UCL CutKilo instagram:

@cut.kilo

Personal instagram: @hannarbaldurs